Twenty- five Seven

Personally speaking

Of death, dying and growing old

My sincere apologies to those who don’t particularly want to read about death, dying and growing old, but ever since I read Atul Gawande’s book “Being Mortal”, I have been drawn to death and dying. And since tomorrow is designated as the International Day of Older Persons by the UN, I thought I’d discuss the issues that were put forth by Atul Gawande in his thought-provoking book.

For those of you who haven’t heard of him. Atul Gawande is practicing surgeon in America. Born and raised in the US, son of Indian Immigrant doctors Atul like many a doctor before him, wields the pen with as much skill as he wields the scalpel so even a subject as morose and serious as this one becomes a captivating read.

I often wonder whether the Universe directs me to read certain topics because of things happening in my life or do things happen because I am reading about them? Much like the chicken and the egg, I can’t still figure out what comes first. Perhaps it is a combination of both or perhaps it is the presence of my growing grandchildren that makes me realise that I am older than I’d like to admit?  Or is it the illness of a friend’s mom or the news of the passing on of another friend’s father?

Old age is fraught with its own problems – disability, disease, loneliness and dependence. Atul Gawande’s book deals with all these aspects of growing old and leaves one with a feeling of hope that old age can be something that one can cope with.

Quoting from his own website : 

“Medicine has triumphed in modern times, transforming the dangers of childbirth, injury, and disease from harrowing to manageable. But when it comes to the inescapable realities of aging and death, what medicine can do often runs counter to what it should.

Through eye-opening research and gripping stories of his own patients and family, Gawande reveals the suffering this dynamic has produced. Nursing homes, devoted above all to safety, battle with residents over the food they are allowed to eat and the choices they are allowed to make. Doctors, uncomfortable discussing patients’ anxieties about death, fall back on false hopes and treatments that are actually shortening lives instead of improving them. And families go along with all of it.

In his bestselling books, Atul Gawande, a practicing surgeon, has fearlessly revealed the struggles of his profession. Now he examines its ultimate limitations and failures – in his own practices as well as others’ – as life draws to a close. And he discovers how we can do better. He follows a hospice nurse on her rounds, a geriatrician in his clinic, and reformers turning nursing homes upside down. He finds people who show us how to have the hard conversations and how to ensure we never sacrifice what people really care about.

Riveting, honest, and humane, Being Mortal shows that the ultimate goal is not a good death but a good life – all the way to the very end.”

 

Image result for life and death quotes

Ageing and dying are natural processes yet we try and live life artificially- we defy the ageing process with simple cosmetic changes like dying our hair or dressing young. With de-tox diets, nutritional supplements and anti-oxidants we try and extend our youth till as long as we can and then finally we try and cheat death by defibrillators and ventilators and tubes that feed us.

All of us would wish for a painless death, an end that is swift and peaceful. With longer life spans and smaller families, old age isn’t all about pleasure cruises and Tombola but we can always hope and try to make it as fulfilling and rewarding as our youthful past.

This book definitely makes one think about why old people behave the way they do and how we can cope with their care.

If you are in a situation where you have to interact with older persons, I would urge you to read this book.  

STAT.

Ciao 

 

5 responses to “Of death, dying and growing old”

  1. A really good read is The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche.
    Somehow contemplating death and dying just brings life into vivid focus. My father-in-law was ailing for a while before he passed away and the daily contact with the dying process just opened up a lot of questions about living.

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  2. Thanks for this lead. Will keep this book in mind. Currently I’m very involved in dealing with toddlers and newborns😀

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  3. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Death or old age is definitely not a negative thing for it not to be talked about. I like the philosophical touch in the post. Special attention is required when our parents or grandparents grow old It’s our prime duty driven with love for them. I will try to read the book you have mentioned.

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  4. latawonders18 Avatar
    latawonders18

    It’s a wonderful book, which should be widely read. I, too, had blogged about it in a post titled ‘A daily dose of life’

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  5. Very profound and inescapable at the same time…loved the post!

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