“Finding Fanny” could easily be one of the worst movies I’ve seen. I really don’t know what Homi Adajania was trying to say in this highly idiotic movie. Deepika Padukone is the young widow who lives with her old widowed mother-in-law in the remote village of Pokoli in Goa. One night the village is woken out of its slumber by the loud, blood curdling cries of Ferdinand ( also called Fernando by his childhood lady love) who discovers the unposted love letter in which he’d popped the question to Stephanie Fernandes 46 years ago lying at his doorstep. The next morning Angie wanders into the Post Office (Ferdie’s office) and finds Ferdi absolutely mad with sorrow and regret. Angie decides to help him find Fanny ( Stephanie) and thus begins their adventure through Goa in an old beat up Dodge.

Joining them is Rosalina ( Dimple Kapadia) or Mai – Angie’s mother in law, Don Pedro ( the artist who owns the only car in the village and who is desperately wanting to paint Rosalina)and  Savio ( the returning native who is also fixing the car which was his father’s and which he sold to Don Pedro). With this absurd beginning, the story becomes even more absurd almost unravelling at a slow feni drenched pace , as the motley crowd look for Fanny. The first stop is Fanny’s bungalow which has been bought over by a mad Russian. On the way to Tivoli, the group finds themselves in Karnatka and having gone so far, also out of petrol. Idiotically enough only  Ferdi volunteers to get the petrol but only in the morning since he is scared of the dark. Taking advantage of this interlude, Savio and Deepika re-kindle their love for each other while Don Pedro, Ferdi and Rosalina get drunk on a bottle of brandy.  The next morning Ferdi leaves with a white jerry can and returns with a blue one only to leave the can behind and continue the search for Fanny on his own. On the way back, Rosalina who is sitting in the front seat finds an old revolver in the cubbyhole and accidentally shoots Don Pedro who no one discovers is dead. The revolver makes Savio take a U Turn to go back for Ferdi who was found waiting at a bus stop some miles down the road. The car’s brakes at that moment refuse to work and while trying to get the car to stop, Don Pedro is jettisoned from the car and sinks to the bottom of the sea….. If this is not weird enough, after all the distance the car seems to have lurched out of control, it is only seconds later that Ferdi walks up and the foursome now set off to Tivoli. As they approach the village they come upon a funeral cortege. No prizes for guessing right – it was the funeral procession of Fanny who looked like Porky Pig in a Wedding Gown.

Nothing in this movie makes sense. Why does Ferdi who once was a shippie become so crazy? Why is Savio so angry? How does Angie who is an orphan in an orphanage manage to be a childhood friend of Savio and Gabo ( her husband who choked on the figurines of his wedding cake)? Why do Rosalina and Ferdi marry at the end of the movie?????

Verdict – Truly avoidable.

p.s. The only good thing about this morning was that I managed to meet my friends!

This is my post for Write Tribe September Challenge