Twenty- five Seven

Countdown to Diwali

October 15, 2025
So last week was spent in cleaning and de-cluttering. Cupboard by cupboard, room by room and shelf by shelf . Each item was taken out, inspected and kept back or pitched out.

Walls were wiped down, floors scrubbed clean, brass polished and the house looking ready to welcome anyone and everyone, especially good luck.

Luck plays a significant role in one’s life, and this year we are fortunate to be able to celebrate. Last year, I lost both my parents in quick succession and with my father passing so close to Diwali, I didn’t feel festive at all .

But whether I feel festive or not, it doesn’t matter, Diwali is celebrated over five days . However, officially, the government has declared two days of holiday. And, of course, with changing times, celebrations are often determined by weekends and everyone’s convenience in getting together.

And on each of the five days of Diwali, we celebrate . different aspects of life.

Vasu Baras: Appreciating Nature

A day prior to the actual five day festival, the 12th day of fortnight of the waning moon in the month of Kartik is celebrated as Vasu Baras or the Festival of the Cow and Calf .this is of special significance in Maharashtra where it marks our appreciation and gratitude to Nature symbolised as the cow who gives us milk . So on this day, we worship the cow and thank her for her bounteous gift.

The relationship between a cow and her calf also symbolises the deep bond that exists between a mother and child. So on this day mothers observe a special fast to ward off the evil eye from their kids and be blessed with good luck.

However, having been a city dweller all my life I’ve never had a cow in my backyard so I’ve never fed a cow. Nor have I ever kept a fast for my children . But I do think this is a unique way of acknowledging this deep bond.

Dhantrayodashi- Appreciating abundance

The first day is Dhantrayodashi a day to acknowledge abundance in one’s life. Typically this is observed by the Trading community. And in our home, we just light an oil lamp at dawn and dusk and purchase some jewellery or household gadget/pots that are on my wish list.

Narak Chaturdashi- Celebrating the victory of goodness over evil

On this dark moonless night the demon Narkasur who had once terrorised the earth was slain by Lord Krishna and his wife Satyabhama.

This day of great rejoicing and enlightenment is celebrated with lit oil lamps.

It also happened to be the day Lord Rama returned triumphantly to his kingdom after fourteen tumultuous years of exile. So we continue the tradition of welcoming Him into our homes with lights, floral garlands and rangoli designs on the floor.

Laxmi Pujan -worshipping wealth

This is the main celebration of Diwali where the Goddess of Wealth is welcomed home after she emerges from the churning of the sea. Since our family is not Baniya or a family of traders our Puja is not a grand affair but the simple worship of a silver coin engraved with the goddess Laxmi.

Padva: appreciating new beginnings

The next day which is the beginning of the new month is one of the 3 1/2 auspicious days where every moment is propitious enough to begin a new venture ( without the go-ahead of an astrologer and his calculations).

Among the trading community this is considered as their New Year and start a new accounting year with a puja .

This day is of special significance for married couples when the wife appreciates her husband and honours him with a lighted lamp aarati. Naturally, he gives her a gift in return.

This is also the day when daughters honour their fathers and mothers honour their children. Needless to say, there is an exchange of gifts. Strange as it may sound, gifts are generally cash which is kept in the tray with the lamp.

Bhau Beej : appreciating one’s brothers.

Brothers played a very important role in a Hindu woman’s life, especially when it came to protecting her interests. Thus on this day, a brother is invited to his sister’s home for a good meal.

Once again the sister performs the lit lamp ritual invoking the divine to bless and protect her brother and he gives her a gift.

Legend has it that Yami’s husband annoyed Lord and vowed to kill him . Hearing this Yami (Yama’s twin sister) placated her brother with a fabulous meal and spared her husband’s life !

Last words

This year our Diwali celebration is quiet as we aren’t having the BIG family do at our home. Prima Donna Ms Papaya and I are going to be out of town and Anna Shetty and her family too is celebrating Diwali away from home.

We may have brunch, breakfast or lunch together as a family sometime before Diwali but what we are going to do is definitely have a good time.

Happy Diwali to all those who celebrate this festival and good wishes to those who do not.

Ciao
Here’s a list of the five days of Diwali this year

October 17 : VasuBaras

October 18: Dhanteras or Dhan Trayodashi.

October 19: Nothing

October 20: Narak Chaturdashi

October 21: Diwali with the morning bath and Laxmi Puja

October 22: Balipratipada ( Padva)

October 23: Bhaubeej in the evening.
An attempt to explain the aarati or honouring a person with the lit lamp

The person who is being ‘honoured’ is made to sit in an East West orientation. His forehead is dotted with vermillion and some rice sprinkled on the head. Then the tray with the lit lamp is circled in front of the person.
Diwali- a changing celebration

October 12, 2025

Lights are to Diwali as Cake is to birthdays, so whenever people light up their homes for no apparent reason, others feel as if they are celebrating Diwali. But lights are lit up for weddings and celebrations too. And I remember an aunt of mine used to celebrate Diwali even in the middle of the year because that was when her boys came home.

So there are many ways in which one can celebrate Diwali, though the traditional methods still hold true.

However, they have changed a lot since I was a child. Not only were they simpler, but also celebrated traditionally with home-made sweets, new clothes, fireworks and family time.

lights for Diwali

My Diwali Celebrations

Since my dad’s transferable job took us all over the country, our Diwali has always been a simple family celebration. Sometimes we were lucky enough to celebrate with extended family on either side of the tree, but essentially, our family developed its own way of celebrating festivals.

The bath at the dark dawn

lighted lamp, hot water, sandalwood soap and firecrackers

Believe it or not, back in the day when I was growing up, Diwali mornings would actually be freezing even in Bombay.

My mum would wake us up on the first day of Diwali, at crack of dawn. Believe it or not, but back in the day, it was frightfully cold in Bombay and with our teeth chattering, my brother and I would sit stripped down to our underwear (when we were very young that is). We were made to sit on low wooden stools bordered with rangoli patterns and flanked by a flickering oil lamps. Then in the darkness, my mum would massage us with special scented oil. Off we would be marched to the bathroom one by one as she continued the rub down with This would be followed by a scrub down with herbal paste of turmeric , sandalwood , chick pea flour and fresh cream. This was followed by a soaping down with a specially opened round Moti sandalwood soap. Finally, we’d be rinsed with steaming hot water and rubbed dry with a new towel.

Each one of us would set off a string of firecrackers while having our individual baths.

New was the operative word and after dressing up in our new finery, we’d sit at the table for the special breakfast.

In my own home, the children resisted getting up at dawn. Holidays were meant for a lie-in. They didn’t bother with new clothes either, since clothes were bought all year round. I did, of course, keep away some clothes specially for Diwali but the tradition of shopping for fabrics and choosing patterns was a thing of the past.

Diwali breakfast

Clean and well attired, we looked forward to the Diwali breakfast – a special feast of home made goodies – Ladoos ( hand rolled sweet balls) made of semolina and coconut or toasted chick pea flour. There’d be fresh coconut karanji ( stuffed deep fried pastry) crispy savoury shev , chakli and chivda and some fresh snack like pohe (beaten rice flakes).

After breakfast , my brother and I would be sent off to the neighbour’s house with a plate of goodies covered with a stiffly starched napkin and strict instructions not to dawdle as we had to go to several houses that morning! We returned with more goodies and got down to the exciting competition of judging whose goodies were best!

While my children were little I used to make the customary sweets but with everyone becoming calorie conscious, I now just make the bare minimum as it is considered inauspicious not to light the stove on a festive day.

Similarly , the exchange of goodies is more a style statement with traditional sweets being replaced by store-bought stuff like baskets of fresh fruit, boxes of dry fruit, chocolates & cake delivered by emissaries like drivers and or maids. Worse still, gifts are exchanged well before the festival itself as many people lock up their homes and go away on holiday!

Diwali meals

All meals during Diwali were vegetarian. Breakfast was no longer eggs and toast but pohe or upma. Meals were served with special sweets like Shreekhand or Basundi and at least one meal was eaten with the extended family.

Like everything else this too has changed and I even serve non- vegetarian fare made in non traditional cuisines like Italian and Chinese.

Of course, my grandmother would have been horrified, but I believe that festivals are meant to be enjoyed and food plays a very important part so I hope God forgives me this transgression.

The Festival of Lights

As children, the most exciting part was going to the bazaar to buy clay lamps and firecrackers. These would be sunned for a few days so that they were really dry and ready to be used. Occasionally, my mother would let me colour them.

We’d roll out long , thin cotton wicks and soak them in oil so that they stay lit the whole night. Lamps were lit in the door way or in the verandas, at dawn and dusk two wicks at a time and in a lamp filled with oil.

This was one time of year when we were encouraged to light at least ONE light in each room on at all times ( including the bathroom and store room) so that Good Luck and Prosperity found its way to our home.

Traditional clay lamps have to a large extent given way to tealight candles and electric starry lights and floating candles but essentially the lights still remain the highlight of the festival.

This Diwali doesn’t seem very festive, and I wonder if it is because of the extended rainy weather that has played havoc with our lives and moods.

Nonetheless, I’m going to start with getting things ready for the celebrations tomorrow and hope to make it as festive as I can.

Ciao,
Travails of The Older woman traveller

October 11, 2025
Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com

Just when you think that you have all the time and money to travel, you realise that you don’t want to travel. Not because you can’t travel.

If you are a normal person who doesn’t count every step, you take, analyse every morsel you eat, calibrate the water you drink, tabulate the hours you sleep and live life the way it is meant to be lived, you will find that with every year gone by, your body changes slowly but surely.

You might fit into the clothes you wore on your wedding day, you might be in even better shape but honestly, your body has changed.

And this is a Universal truth.

And what you could do at 20 becomes harder when you are 40 and even more difficult when you are 60. And almost impossible when you are 80.

I discovered this the other day when I tried to hop on one leg. I found that I could barely get my foot two inches off the ground! So don’t kid yourself, you are not what you were last year and if you are planning a trip somewhere, here are some tips to keep in mind.

Travelling which was fun in your younger days is no longer the same. Undoubtedly travel is much easier with better access to places, faster means of transport and better facilities on the road.

But

Your body has grown older and needs special attention while travelling.

Ten years ago, my friend told me that we had only a few years of travel left in us. I was aghast. We were only in our late 50s and were strong and fit. We were free from work deadlines, school routines and all the usual stuff that takes up time to see the world. But now I realise what she meant. As you grow older, your focus changes, your body changes and your destinations change too.

No longer do you want to cavort on the beach with your kids. No longer do you have to look for kid friendly destinations. No longer do you have to wait for the right friend to travel with. You are truly free to roam the world.

I never realised how difficult it is to travel as a Senior. Till as late as 10 years ago, I would look at all the seniors whizzing past me on airports with clunky closed shoes, cardigans and big bags clutched firmly in their laps as they watched me walk miles and miles with my strolley carry on luggage. I never thought that one day I too would want to sit in one of those airport carts rather than walk.

Travelling these days, especially for Seniors has become quite tedious. With flight delays, cancellations and all kinds of difficulties, one has to be prepared for any eventuality.

Before you travel.

Even before you plan to go somewhere, make sure that it is to a place you can go to.
- Make sure that you are going to the right place. For instance, there is no point in going to visit a place where you have to climb a thousand steps to see any monument. And even if you have to travel to that place ( if you are going in a group or with family), ensure that there is a lift or at least a ramp or at best a railing.
- Keep your medications with you at all times and any other stuff that you may need. Even if you are travelling to a familiar place or within the country, your medications may NOT be available or easily available so don’t depend on buying them later. Flight delays, lost baggage can leave you stranded without your regular medicines. So keep them with you at all times.
- Have the name of a local contact. I used to find it very amusing when my parents would try and dig up some long lost cousin or a friend of a friend living in the place I was visiting. But over the years, I find it helps to know someone other than the Hotel concierge or even your Tour Guide to help you in an emergency.
- Time your arrivals and departures at reasonable times. Whenever looking for suitable trains/planes/boats, remember to take into account the amount of time you need before actual departure or arrival. There is no point in leaving or arriving well before or after your regular sleeping and waking times.
- Find out if your hotel/resort is Senior friendly. During a recent trip, I discovered that the hotel we were booked in was most un Senior friendly. The rooms were far away from the restaurants and the general service area. The pathways were slippery, and unmarked and the entire property poorly lit.
- Location. While a holiday share may be a reasonable way to see the world, it may not always be conveniently located. It always helps to get a hotel that is centrally located so that you could just wander around close by and get a feel of the city/town. Remember, you are no longer young or spry enough to jump into local trains or buses.
- Companion . As far as possible, travel with a friend or companion – one who you can count on to hold your hand if required.
While you are on the Move
- Something to nibble. It helps to keep some nuts/biscuits or even a fruit handy should you feel like a bite. Needless to say, you should always carry a bottle of water or at least a bottle to fill water.
- A jacket or shawl is always handy. A hat or scarf helps too.
- Sit by the window if possible. Sitting in the middle seat can be difficult especially when going on a long road trip. In a plane or train, I prefer this seat so that you don’t have people going ‘over’ you.
- Carry a book to read or music to listen to. Long waiting periods can get tedious and boring so it helps to have your own entertainment with you.
- Phone chargers and power banks have become essentials these days.
- Dealing with incontinence. Toilets or restroom stops may not always be possible so it helps to wear a diaper while on the move.
This may sound scary to those of you who still travel with a backpack but it always helps to be prepared.

So throw away those doubts and fears. Dust off your luggage, find a friend and book your ticket to the place you’ve always wanted to go to.

Ciao