There are moments in almost everyone’s life when one feels like running away. Then there are moments when one feels like running away forever, like in committing suicide. But then, when one has run away, especially forever can you come back? Sadly no.

Many years ago when my children were born a friend of mine who also had young children actually jumped out from her flat on the 18th floor of her building. She also jumped along with her two young children, one of whom managed to wiggle out and come back to tell the rest of the family that her mother had jumped out with her brother. Obviously both of them died and when the bodies were brought up for their last journey, my friend’s mother died of shock and within two days, the family lost three of their loved ones.

Whenever I pass this building I remember my friend, a gentle soul who always had a hint of sorrow in her eyes which we always attributed to her deep broody nature that made her squiggle the most beautiful and artistic cards. In fact I have kept one of her last birthday cards to me as a reminder of how precious life is and how we shouldn’t squander it away particularly in a moment of despondency.

But how about those people for whom every day is a struggle and that too a struggle with no end in sight such as a terminal disease? While they suffer physically, their family does suffers too. Won’t the family be better off with this one final death than a death every day?

Here’s another story –

Some years ago a young school child was hit by a speeding car and was knocked unconscious. I don’t remember how long she lay unresponsive, but the mother was determined not to turn off the ventilator and after she was weaned from life support, the mother was convinced that her child would return back to this world. Her faith proved justified as the girl has now gone back to her old life.

Life and death are not in our hands. We have all come into this world for a reason – whether it is to make others happy or sad. We have to fulfil our destinies and live out each day as it comes to us. This, however, is easier said than done : especially in today’s world where each one of us is on her/his own individual treadmill. There are many of us who have families and friends. There are many of us who have a million things to do. Equally there are many for whom the moments stretch to hours and years of loneliness and despair. At times like this, suicide seems to be the best answer – the only escape from misery.

Unfortunately that is not true. When a life ends a huge vacuum is created and when a person ends his/her life voluntarily there is not only a huge vacuum but a conundrum as well. The people left behind are racked with guilt , forever asking themselves questions – Why did I not see it coming? Couldn’t I have done something to stop it?

Can you really prevent someone from killing himself ?

I read somewhere that the Buddha said that all life is suffering but I also believe that without suffering there would be no joy. After all if there is no day, there will be no night so we should learn to accept the bad just as graciously as we accept the good.

A business colleague of my husband, who was a 100% sure of signing a deal  had  asked the manager of the hotel we were staying in, to book us the best table at the best restaurant, chill the best champagne and have the best musician on hand  so that when we returned after the meeting we would have the perfect celebration to commemorate  the million dollar deal which was a done deal really, with all the improbables having already been dealt with. But since life is not always a fairy tale, the deal fell through. The colleague was ready to jump out of the window – he had not only lost money but had also lost face. He stared morosely out of the tenth floor balconey then slowly turned to my husband and asked him to take him to the most miserable place in the city. My husband took him to the deepest part of the old town which was a mess of labyrinthine lanes, with open gutters, where people walked shoulder to shoulder, where houses ran into one another, electric wires mingled with wash lines and where flies outnumbered the people. We spent an hour in that mess and came back to our hotel and opened the bottle of champagne. Anything was better than the quagmire we had just visited and we felt happy to be alive. Happy to be able to enjoy the better things of life.

In hindsight, losing that deal was the best thing that happened. Dark clouds do have silver linings. All you have to hang on to see the sun shine the next day.

                                                              
This is my post for Write Tribe ProBlogger September Challenge and  #suicide prevention